Self-Imposed Writers Block

The thing about writing a blog that prides itself on its honesty and ‘bare-all’ attitude is that sometimes you have to draw a line. This writing I do right here is so very important to me and has shaped me in a way I never felt possible. It’s helped me through hard times and cheered me through happy ones; blogging is a part of my life that is so important I can barely articulate what it means to me. It’s not only my job but my life, my friends, my happy place.

Because of the nature of my oversharing on my blog I am naturally going to come up against obstacles sometimes. Some things that are huge parts of my life, no matter how much I’d like to write about them, are off-limits because they also involve other people. I hate finding myself in these situations because my default coping mechanism is to write, so when that’s not possible I feel stifled and bunged up.

I’m going through one of those times now. In the last few days I’ve gone through a real spectrum of emotions: heartbreak, anger, feeling alone, sad and despondent. A peek of happiness and relief. I’ve tried to keep away from my computer because all I want to do is sit and write and get it out but I can’t.

So instead I’ve been back in the garden, digging dirt and replacing with the happiness that the colour of spring flowers bring. I’ve been cooking with my beautiful little girl and scooping the crusty bits out my poorly little boy’s eyes (surprise surprise, we’re back to the doctor’s this afternoon). I’ve cried over glasses of wine with my mum and cackled over G&Ts with my friends. I’ve said this many times but it remains true: it takes a really rocky patch for you to appreciate and understand how important and wonderful your family and friends are.

TheBestThingsInLifeAreAlwaysTheHardest

The Best Things In Life, via lovely Fritha on Etsy

So, in a nutshell: god, things get tough as a grown-up don’t they? These decisions you have to make and experiences you must go through, they can really take it out of a person. I’m consoling myself with the thought at the moment that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger and as tough as I may be finding life right now it will make me a better person, one way or another.

Another huge big consolation to me was the news that this year I have been shortlisted for a BritMums Brilliance In Blogging award, in the Lifestyle category! I am completely over the moon to have been recognised and I would like to thank everyone who nominated me from the bottom of my heart. I managed to drink a whole bottle of Prosecco at the awards ceremony last year before making some very lewd comments about the Butlers In The Buff who were in attendance. If I were to make it through to that stage this year I promise you much more of the same.

If I could implore you to head this way to the voting form and select ‘More Than Toast‘ in the Lifestyle category you would make this over-sharer extremely happy indeed. You can vote in only one category if you like (though you should vote in more as there are some fantastic blogs in there!). Thank-you!

15 Comments
  1. Poor you, I can relate, I’m harboring a huge secret at the moment and all I want to do it put it out there! It’s a daily struggle not to blog it. Hope things turn right soon. x

  2. That really doesn’t sound like fun. I’m sorry it’s hard at the moment.
    I understand the frustration of a self imposed writers block! I have a lot of things I ban myself from blogging about in detail (think family) and it’s a pain in the arse because writing is my relief and release.
    I hope things come good in the end & that H feels better very soon.
    Congrats on the being shortlisted for the bib! I’ll be voting for you.
    Also I’m keeping a keen eye on your gardening posts. I’m totally rubbish and clueless where green stuff is concerned but feeling the need to grow stuff this year!
    X

  3. So sorry to hear things are tough for you right now – sending lots of love and virtual glasses of Prosecco (not that virtual ones are all that much use I’m sure…). Big congrats on getting shortlisted, thoroughly deserved and I have voted for you already m’luv! Good luck! xx

  4. Hi Alice, I love your blog and have already voted. You have got me through my pregnancy and the first 5 chaotic months of being a mum to twin boys. You are a wonderful writer and your honesty makes me feel like I am not alone or going crazy! Good luck, Angela

  5. Sorry to hear things aren’t great, spending time with friends and family is definitely a live-saver, keep them close, and hope you feel better soon

  6. I hear you. Sometimes I write down the stuff I can’t share anywhere, juts to get it off my chest. It’s not the same, but it definitely helps. Hope you feel better soon. And poor Hux as well.
    Dxx
    PS: Voted already!

  7. I hear you. There are things that I would love to talk about on social media and through various blogs but just can’t. Especially as often they are the most upsetting things and things I need to process the most. So sorry to hear you’re going through all this at the moment. I have one of Fritha’s prints on my wall which says “deep down I know it’ll be ok” and it means a lot to me and reassures me as I walk past it each day, I have to believe that some things will all be ok and hurt less one day. I agree with previous comment – write about it anyway. Share it with someone close if you need to. It helps.

  8. Hi, I’ve just found your blog, and have been reading the May entries. I’ve followed you now and will see if its not too late to vote! I’ve enjoyed what I’ve read. I’ve blogged for a few years, and probably write more personally than is sensible. I’ve just been through an upsetting time but it’s therapeutic to put it all down on a blog and I guess if it helps someone else in the same situation I don’t mind. Enjoy NYC, it looks amazing :)

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