The breaks I take from my blog are never intentional. I’m still here, just a little less so.
The most recent one has been down to nothing more than a simple lack of mojo: for me this always seems to happen at the beginning of winter in the time between having BBQs and hunkering down in front of the fire. I just seem to lose my way a bit… Perhaps it goes under the bed, vacuum packed with my summer dresses and flip flops?
Mojo aside, there’s been loads going on here. Elfie finished her first term of big school, Hux tested a few (many) boundaries, I took a trip to Jersey and swam in the sea. Life is, as always, full to bursting!
One of my problems is that I’m feeling really full of ideas that in itself is kind of paralysing. It’s like, I have so much to do, so many goals to fulfil, that I just don’t know where to start.
Which work strand is most important? Do I bite the bullet and do the thing that’s going to cost me my savings but might be really really cool in the long run? Do I invest in an assistant so I can pass off a load of my time-consuming admin onto someone and focus on the money making? Do I go back to an office for the role I’ve been headhunted for?
When I don’t know what to do I panic, and then don’t do anything at all. It’s a self-perpetuating situation. If I’m panicking I don’t do anything, if I don’t do anything I’m not earning any money, if I’m not earning any money I’m worrying about being skint, if I worry about being skint I make stupid decisions with money.
Being a grown-up is hard, eh?
This week I’ve made a resolution to stop worrying so much, to just get on with doing what I love doing: writing here, spending time with the people I love and, most importantly, to push ahead with the things that are scaring me the most (and I’m not talking about Halloween). We are our own worst enemies sometimes, and though my to-do list might be much longer than my patience, I need to have confidence in just getting on with it and everything being OK.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it ;)
If you’re interested, here are some internet things I’ve been loving in my blog absence:
The absolute best cashmere jumper: machine washable and people will tell you how soft you feel when they hug you. I’ve bought it in two colours! (Raspberry and Neutral)
7 Things That Happen When You Go Through IVF, from my lovely friend Alison Perry
Robert Webb on Tackling the Domestic Load
Rhianna is All of Us When It Comes to Relationships
50 Unfiltered Celebrity Quotes About Divorces
P!nk Speaking The Truth On Marriage
The Badass Woman’s Hour – totally addicted to this podcast