Things I won’t miss about being pregnant
– Being tired ALL THE TIME. So much exhaustion, it’s exhausting. Who are these glowy happy pregnant women and where do they get their energy reserves from (sidenote: I think they are all celebrities with live-in yoga instructors)?
– Whatever body part that keeps becoming wedged in my right hip. Ow.
– Only being able to wear clothes with a lot of stretch.
– Peeing in a really really small container every four weeks. Why is it so tiny and can anyone aim that well?
– Not being able to reach my toes. Or the floor.
– Obsessing over how something THAT BIG is going to squeeze through a hole THAT SMALL.
– People in shops looking at me, looking at my belly, then stepping back. I’m not going to give birth ON YOU, idiot.
Things I will miss about being pregnant:
– The freckle that only appears when I’m pregnant because it’s on the inside of my belly button.
– The excuse to wear leggings, yoga pants or pyjamas. All day long.
– Not having to suck in my belly after eating carbohydrates.
– Elfie lifting up my tshirt and kissing the bump. It’s as cute as it sounds.
– Growing a person from scratch. Every time I think of the spine, fingers, toes, eyes, hair and brain that I have nurtured for nine months it blows my mind. And freaks me out.