Welcome to 12 weeks; when I still feel and look like crap!
This pregnancy is simultaneously dragging and speeding along. Dragging because I wake up every morning feeling like I spent the night before mixing sambucca, white wine and espresso martinis and dancing til 4am, speeding because I’m still having to drag my bum out of bed to do normal person functions like parent a toddler, work and cook. If you add in my inability to not fall asleep until after 1am and fondness of lying in bed all night listening to the noise of potential burglars breaking in (it’s always the boiler) then you have a barrel of laughs. Not. Thank goodness my husband is a saint and is happy to get up every morning with Elfie as we try and sleep train the hell out of her 5am wakeups.
So there I am, up there, in my full first trimester glory. You will be pleased to know that as soon as I downloaded the photos of me at 12 weeks from my camera I promptly gave myself a manicure, a fake tan, a blow dry and a talking-to. I bought myself a tube of NanoBlur (my god it’s a miracle product, I might even have to vlog about it) and finally unpacked all my clothes so I can wear something other than stretchy jeans and Breton stripes. I don’t know if it’s been the mental effect of feeling better about the way I look or that I’m coming to the end of the first trimester but I feel less and less like an ogre every day. I can go 12 hours without a nap, for one, and I’ve been cooking and eating actual food (not just baked beans).
I don’t have a bump as such yet – but I do look very bloated. A bit like when I eat a stack of white bread. I’m looking forward to the time I will bloom with life rather than look like I ate all the pies, but every day I feel my uterus rising up so hopefully this won’t be too far away.
Today we finally saw the baby! The three of us had a trip to the hospital for a scan and blood test, and though we’ve known there’s a foetus inside me for a long time it was still a total shock to actually see it. It was moving and kicking – it had arms and legs! I think it was hiccuping at one point. It was very, very cute.
But seeing the baby on the inside made me remember one thing: we have to get it out of there. In six short months. When it’ll be much bigger. Ouch. Time to dig out my copy of Hypnobirthing for Beginners and Ina May’s Guide to Natural Childbirth… or maybe just cross my fingers.