It’s Valentines day!! Which means you either celebrate or make sicky noises with your finger in your throat, depending on what camp you’re in. At our house we have one in each camp, and bearing in mine I LOVE flowers, jewellery, perfume and candlelit meals you can guess where I’m pitching my tent.
This year the man did good and came home from work with an utterly lovely bunch of flowers from a proper florist at Borough Market, a thoughtful card and our first ever Valentine’s night dinner date booking. I’m really looking forward to holding hands and staring at each other over a bowl of poppadoms at the local curry house along with 100 other clichéd couples. I love you, baby!
As a treat for me this Valentine’s day Marks and Spencer send us a gift card with a couple of conditions: we were to spend the money on lingerie, and as a romance-related challenge I had to let my husband choose what he thought I’d like. Now, in our 10 year relationship Will has bought me clothes a few times so I was thinking he might have an idea of my taste. As an extra twist on the challenge I left sizing up to him, too (insert evil cackle here).
The day before I let him loose in the lingerie department of M&S I visited myself and drew up a shortlist of 10 items I would purchase. Then I abandoned him, head scratching and looking confused.
So, how did he do?
Sidenote: since Hux stopped breastfeeding I have experienced a bit of shrinkage and droopage in the boobage department. Not the end of the world as I no longer have to wear those clippy front-opening nursing bras (woohooh!) but still annoying, all the same. But this does mean I’m rotating three bras at the moment, two utterly impractical Agent Provocateur lacy jobs from my old life (I would NEVER buy hand wash silk underwear these days) and a bobbled old M&S tshirt bra. I was sorely in need of new undergarments.
1. 2 x Padded Tshirt Bras, £12.50, 2. Rose Lace Padded Bra with Silk, £22.50, French Designed Rose Lace Brazilian Knickers, £12.50.
Will came back with two sets of lingerie: his thinking was that one of them were for my ‘sexy’ days and the other were for my ‘comfy’ days. I like his thinking and he kept within budget, good job that man. However, neither sets of underwear were ones I would have chosen. I like my plain bras either black, white or flesh coloured and my sexy bras, well, a bit more sexy I suppose.
His sizing were brilliant: one bra was a 34D and one a 32D. Very flattering, darling! Unfortunately I’m closer to a 34B (I miss you big boobies). The pants he chose were an 8 which I was delighted at – I’m a 10 but get my pants in a 12 as I don’t like them too tight. It’s wonderful that my husband thinks I have big boobs and a small bottom though.
1. Limited Collection Spotted Balcony, £7.60, Floral Lace Spotted Shorts, £3.60. 2. 2 x Padded Underwired Bras, £12.50 3. Limited Collection Floral Lace Bra, £14.00, Floral Lace Mesh Bikini Knickers, £6.00
After congratulating Will on his choices and sending him off to do something manly it was my turn to go shopping: I went for a pair of spotted underwear in dusky pink with boyshorts (1) – my favourite. I thought this was a great everyday set that would still make me feel a bit special. On the sexier side of things I went with some floral lace undies in black with bikini-style bottoms (3). Completely unbeknown to me there was a sale on Limited Collection items (my favourite of M&S’s lingerie range) so I got a hefty discount on these items.
Because I have an absolute stack of these pants (the comfiest around) I also went for a double pack of t-shirt bras in black and white (2) for my plainer days.
M&S are also running a promotion online and in-store at the moment where if you get professionally measured (or watch their measuring video) you get an additional £5 off.
Cor, I love buying underwear.
In conclusion, if you want to wear a well-fitting bra don’t let your husband choose it. DO let him shower you with flowers and take you out to dinner, though. Happy Valentine’s Day!!
So you set your husband a task for him that was pretty much unwinnable just so you could write a blog post? Way to emancipate. Wouldn’t it have been way more full of win if you’d armed him for success with a clue and a size, so that he could’ve felt good about it and you’d have got what you wanted.
And whilst I’m at it, what’s manly stuff? Power tools perhaps? Big telly? Let me tell you, there’s nothing more manly than buying lingerie for a loved one, if you know it’s gonna fit and that she’ll like it. He’d have felt like a million quid. Instead you probably made him feel like shit.
Sorry to have offended! I realise my particular brand of humour sometimes does not translate into writing… take a chill pill and don’t lose any sleep over my husband’s feelings. This was something we both had fun with.
Also, I am unable to take ‘anon’ comments too seriously. I welcome constructive criticism but stop hiding behind your computer screen! Be a power tooling big telly-wielding man and tell me who you are!
hehehehehe….
i’m quite male, and very much understand the meaning of the word emancipate. Thanks.
Does anon make any difference other than giving you the chance to call troll? I regret having given you the opportunity to diffuse.
You’re wrong, your attempt at humour translates perfectly into writing. Except it’s not humour, and instead reminds me of people branding their own flavour of casual racism as humorous. It’s insulting.
You know what’s romantic? Empowerment. It’s not even manly – it’s just awesome. Sadly, it’s evident from this post and the subsequent Valentines entry, that it’s you who doesn’t know the meaning of a word this time.
Ah, I see you’ve been watching Twitter.
I have to respectfully disagree with you: my poking a little bit of fun at my husband is in no way similar to others branding their casual humour as racism. You see one side of our marriage on my blog. It’s a happy, complex, interesting relationship that has spanned a decade. We respect each other hugely and I would never dream of publicly humiliating him!
We are empowered in different ways. To me, asking my husband to shop for my lingerie – and him accepting the challenge – was funny because it’s so far and away from his day-to-day. He only very occasionally buys me clothes (and the last time he bought me shoes he came back with a size 8; I’m a 5). We find it FUNNY.
It’s not up to me to prove to you how much I love my husband. Much the same as it’s not really up to you to tell me to stop emasculating my husband when that’s the last thing that’s happening.
I note your IP is American… maybe we can chalk this up to cultural differences?
Ha perhaps Mr Anon has got it wrong before? Raw nerves hurt huh!
Hungry troll is hungry.
Here’s a fun exercise, though, Alice. Imagine if you had the kind of relationship with Will where this had emancipated (emasculated?) him and caused an actual problem with your relationship. I’m fairly sure this post would be very different then (if it even existed at all). Maybe that’s the sort of combative relationship the above commenter is in.
Empowerment sure is romantic (is it, though? Or is the condescending notion of empowering your partner just ludicrous?) but y’know what everyone loves? To laugh. Things like this are harmless as long as there’s always the understanding that you’re not taking it too seriously. With some couples, I daresay the bigger bra would’ve caused an issue (you wish my boobs were bigger, don’t you? DON’T YOU?!) and maybe even the style choices (don’t I dress sexy enough?!) for some people, but who cares about causing issues? It’s more fun to laugh, and if your relationship is suited to it, why not set silly challenges?
Masculism is going to be really pesky, and totally miss the point, isn’t it?
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m sending my wife out to buy me some video games with very little specific knowledge of my tastes.
Totally love all that you’ve said with how other women might be offended (“you wish my boobs were bigger? WAAAH”)…
One thing I struggle with here though is the notion of emancipation. Most of my blog deals with the idea of women who have left work to become stay at home mothers and how it’s hard to suddenly become a slave to your working husband (I.E. ME!). I guess the above commenter didn’t get that far.
Which makes me assume he’s been googling ‘Ladies Lingerie’.
My sarcasm detector is freaking out right now at the very idea of you ever getting into a situation where you feel repressed by a man! Granted, it’s been a good while since I last saw you, but I can’t ever imagine that happening.
On the subject, I’m excited (nervous) to see how my being the sole earner affects my marriage. It’s an interesting dynamic that I’d never really considered before, and it never even sarcastically occurred to me that people would adopt that arrangement as a power thing!
It’s evident to all who actually take time to read your entire blog and not just a singular post, that the relationship you and Will share is one of fun, love & respect. I thought the bra shopping was hilarious! Even if I asked my significant other to I company me on a lingerie purchasing mission he’d blanch and deftly refuse! The fact that Will was ‘up for the challenge’ demonstrates a dynamic in your relationship where he feels empowered enough to try this crazy idea, knowing full well you’d be writing all about it! But I would say that wouldn’t I Mr Troll – after all I don’t have a penis so wouldn’t be able to comprehend the concept of emancipation.
I love how he bought two different sizes to hedge his bets, and it’s very cute that he’s blessed you with a size 8 bottom! I can’t even imagine what my partner would come home with …